The Weight Thing (again)

I have been pretty straight forward with my weight and struggles with it. I have never been “thin” even when I was thin. I carry my weight well and always have. Recently, between back issues, being laid off and pretty much being a slug. I decided to finally start doing something about it again. The real shocker for me was going up in pantyhose, those queens didn’t fit like they once did. I stepped on the scale and to my dismay I was over 200 pounds something I said I would never let happen (206 to be exact). I logged it into my FitBit and thought what can I do, diet and exercise. I started exercising, almost every day (small workouts 10-20 minutes). I did this for almost a month. My weight didn’t budge. About a week ago, I finally said screw it, I am doing Whole30 again.

It is day 8, my family is still alive and I feel really good. I am not missing the wine or the sugar. There was one night I had a dream of killer gummy bears but that was it. I discovered cauliflower hummus (it is amazing) and I love the white potato introduction. I am missing my Larabars but this has been much easier. I also made cauliflower mushroom risotto last night it was incredible. I have also started incorporating The 30 Day Shred into my exercise routine (not every day – I am too old for that) and was proud of myself yesterday because I really didn’t want to do it but I did it anyways.

Tomorrow night will be the real test, we have a Happy Hour work meeting at one of my favorite places. No alcohol, I can eat 3 things on the menu so I will be going the food route opposed to drinking. My awesome seltzer and lime will be fine (I am going to tell them to make it look like a gin and tonic so I don’t feel so ridiculous).

After all this time, weight is a daily struggle, it isn’t easy and the older I have gotten the harder it has become. What do I want out of this journey? I want to fit into Queen pantyhose again, seriously Q+ suck. They cost more and the quality is not the best either (I am lucky to get one wear out of them). I want my headaches to go away and my body to stop hurting (both have started to happen). Eight days in I am sleeping better, I am logging my food (shocking I know). I am a snacker or a grazer, a little here, a little there. It does make me more aware of how much food I am consuming and what I am consuming. I don’t know what the answer is or will be about my weight, I know when I started working outside the home six years ago, I fell off the wagon hard. I am hoping to at least stay on the wagon even if I am hanging on for dear life.

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